21 petrifying phrases to tell a classical musician this Halloween

26 October 2021, 12:14

Scary things to tell a musician
Scary things to tell a musician. Picture: Crazy Violinist/Giphy/Classical-Crap/Tumblr

By Maddy Shaw Roberts

Want to freak out a classical musician this Halloween? Here are some spooky phrases you can use...

Trick-or-treat your musician friends this Halloween, with these 100% evil made-up phrases.

  1. “They said the overhead lockers were too full, so we’ve just put your cello in the hold. Hope that’s OK. x”

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  2. “The practice rooms are all taken”

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  3. “You can transpose by sight, can’t you?”

  4. “Hey man, I’ll drop your violin bow back to you in a bit. You’re meant to wash them with soap, right?”

    Soapy violin
    Soapy violin. Picture: reddit
  5. “Hope you’re ready for your solo tonight!”

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  6. “You can read alto clef, right?”

  7. “Hey, I heard your old music teacher is coming to the concert tonight”

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  8. “The page turner just dropped out. You can turn your own music though, right?”

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    (📷 Manuel Tomadin)

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  9. “The music’s in 12/8, key is D flat minor and the concert’s in an hour”

    D flat minor pumpkin
    D flat minor pumpkin. Picture: Classic FM/Getty
  10. “Watch out for that modulation over the page”

  11. “I heard your ex is coming to your recital tonight. It’s cool that you guys are still friends.”

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  12. “You can conduct *and* play the bassoon, right?”

  13. “You’ve gone viral!”

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  14. “Remember that time you said you could sing in five languages? I need a favour…”

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  15. “Hey man, saw the review last night. Don’t listen to them, I think you sounded great.”

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  16. To a singer: “... cough lolly?”

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  17. “Agh, our soprano’s just pulled out for Boris Godunov tonight. You’re fluent in Russian, right?”

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  18. “The sound engineers say they’ve had some trouble tonight – but I told them you could just sing a bit louder.”

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  19. “Good luck at the concert tonight!”

    Fun way
    Picture: classical-crap/Tumblr
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  20. “Hey, thanks for letting me borrow your violin. That post bit inside is supposed to rattle around, right?”

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  21. “Just seen the video online. Don’t worry, it happens to the best of us. Your career will recover.”

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